How Can I Deal With The Negative Impacts Of Divorce?
One of the best ways to deal with the negative impacts of divorce is to work to minimize them. This is both a matter of lowering the conflict and preparing for your new single life....
Children and Divorce: The Rules
As a general rule, the best thing you can do for your children during a divorce is to keep the impacts on them to a minimum....
Giving Children A Voice In Divorce
A question that comes up from time to time is: how much should the children be given a voice in the divorce? This generally relates to the parenting plan. I cannot think of issues related to the financial settlement where this would generally be a question, although some issues related to the paren...
How To Avoid A Negative Divorce With Children
Children tend to prefer stability and predictability over change. Stability and predictability feel safe. Divorce means change. On the other hand, a home with significant conflict also does not feel safe, and even without open conflict a home where love between the parents is missing sets our chi...
Holiday Planning For Divorcing Parents
In the course of a divorce involving children, the parents will need to develop a parenting plan that determines how they share time with the children, including various holidays and special occasions. For many families, the December holiday season is one of the most important family times of the y...
How To Navigate Divorce With Children
Children do make divorce harder. Because they are so easily hurt by the divorce, we have to work much harder to create an outcome that will not only be positive for ourselves, but positive for them as well - and sometimes those two goals are not well matched....
How Do I Get More Time with My Children?
We often hear from parents who are unhappy with their current parenting plan and want to have more time with their children. While the standard you have to meet for modifying a parenting plan is a tough one, there are several options to consider:...
“Compassionate Divorce” – My Thoughts on an Article by Roger B. Ley
I just read an article in our local Bar magazine, NWLawyer, by attorney Roger B. Ley on Compassionate Divorce. Basically, Roger's thesis is that kindness gets better results than vindictiveness. I agree wholeheartedly! Roger points out that when one side to a divorce makes room for thinking about...
Do Children Get a Say In Custody?
Under Washington law, children do not get to determine their custody arrangements. They may, however, get some chance to influence the court's decision. I have never seen a court allow a child to testify directly in court, as the court tries to avoid putting the children in the middle of the divorc...
Can I Get Sole Custody?
In Washington State we do not generally discuss parenting in terms of "custody". Normally in this state, the parents share custody of the children; i.e. both parents continue to be involved in raising the children. One parent might have the children more of the time (often referred to as the "prima...