The collaborative divorce process offers numerous advantages. The most obvious benefit is that, in some cases, it can save a significant amount of time and money by constructively working together rather than litigating in court. 

That said, many couples feel that they reach a more satisfactory conclusion because they are actively engaged in the process. Furthermore, the collaborative divorce process allows them to express their needs and wants in a constructive way. Ultimately, the process allows both parties to be involved in reaching an agreement rather than putting their issues before a judge and letting a third party decide their future. 

Collaborative divorce may sound like the ideal divorce, but it isn’t for every couple, and that’s okay. In general, collaborative divorce may not be the best option for you in the following situations:

• You and your spouse cannot be amicable towards each other or cannot be productive when working together in a joint meeting.
• You and your spouse have diametrically opposing viewpoints when it comes to fundamental issues such as child custody and financial matters.
• There is a history of physical, verbal, or emotional abuse.

Of course, none of these issues are necessarily fatal if the spouses are willing to set aside their differences and work together in good faith. An experienced Seattle collaborative divorce attorney can provide some guidance as to whether it would work for you or whether there might be some better options. 

Occasionally we have a couple who do not do well in the collaborative process. The process is not for everyone, which is why we need to have a discussion before we start about whether it is the right kind of process for you. It takes a dedication to working hard, to working cooperatively, and to speaking for yourself (with professional support where needed).

When a couple tries collaborative divorce but ultimately finds that it is not working well for them, we then discuss what their alternatives are and help them transition to new counsel (generally litigation attorneys) who can help them move forward in a new direction.

However, usually even in those cases there has been a substantial amount accomplished in the collaborative process that they can carry forward to limit the issues needing to be resolved through the courts.

Unfortunately, both parties must agree to participate in the collaborative divorce process in order for it to proceed. 

Litigation in court is almost always an unpleasant and expensive experience for the participants, though it is sometimes still the best option, depending on the circumstance.  If collaborative divorce isn’t an option, an experienced lawyer can explain what you might expect from a litigated divorce proceeding.